Fuck You Bambi. You Slag.

Stop. Look. Listen.

That’s what my mum told me to do when crossing the road. Bambi was obviously not fucking told this and therfore thinks it’s OK to run out into on coming traffic. The traffic on this occasion being me. In my own car. Fuck. I now have a nicely cracked front bumper and slightly bent wing.

Look. See. Parr.

If I got hit by another car, no worries I just claim on their insurance, who do I claim against when Bambi decides to do a suicide run in front of me? Bambi? My life is a fucking parr sometimes I swear.

Living in the countryside is shit, bet I wouldn’t get Bambi running out into the road at night if I lived in Bow.

For those animal welfare type fucks who are actually concerned of what became of Bambi after she collided with my car bumper, well I’m not exactly sure. After inspecting the damage she had done to my car at the roadside, I then drove off, leaving her sprawled out in the middle of road unable to move. She was still alive tho… just… calling out my name to help her… well fuck you Bambi!